


May I Have This Dance

by daddyoshie



Category: Hockey RPF, Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: 2018-2019 NHL Season, Established Relationship, Forced Separation, M/M, Separations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-05-25
Packaged: 2020-03-14 16:38:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18951922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daddyoshie/pseuds/daddyoshie
Summary: The music changed to a slow, heartsick ballad at the perfect moment. Of course it did. The universe perpetually kept them apart, but once in a blue moon everything aligned perfectly for just a short moment.





	May I Have This Dance

**Author's Note:**

> Hello friends, I am back on my bullshit, back with more of my favorite pairing. Please enjoy this short fic, and yes it is meant to hurt you.
> 
> Thank you so much to AO3 user storiesinthedark for the beta, I appreciate it so much, you helped make this a lot better.

The room was beautiful. Twinkle lights, shimmering tinsel, spots of greenery, and glittering silver decorations all made the dimly lit room feel like a snowy winter wonderland. The air smelled like peppermint and cookies, and the speaker crooned Christmas music of all types, both fun and plucky, and slow and romantic, interspersed with pop tunes. The music flowed from the front of the room, where the whole team, clad in their tuxes and party gear, along with their loved ones, packed onto the dance floor. This private party was a change from the normal team holiday party, but everyone had clamored at the opportunity to dress up and drink too much eggnog.

Kuzy stood at the back of the room, in the corner behind the Christmas tree. He looked out and watched all his teammates, smiling and dancing and kissing their partners. Kuzy had been excited by the prospect of this event, but now he just felt sad. The one person he wanted to be with, to share a dance with, wasn’t here, and hadn’t been here for a long time.

His heart ached every single day. He missed him more than he’d ever care to admit. He tried not to think about it too much, trying to be a positive force of energy on the team and putting on a smiling face in the locker room and for the cameras. Letting them think he didn’t have a care in the world.

But tonight, he couldn't. He couldn’t go out there among the team and dance the night away. For just one night, he decided it was okay to hold back and feel a little sad. Of course he still went to the event, he would never consider skipping, but his plan was to hang in the back and graze from the buffet table. That was about all the energy he could muster up. Seeing all of this love and happiness on this particular night made his heart hurt.

Kuzy was contemplating going for yet another gingerbread cookie, when he saw something out of the corner of his eye. He knew it had to be his mind playing tricks on him. For a split second, he thought he saw  _ him _ here, but it wasn’t possible, the Devils were in Columbus. This just meant that he was so lonely his subconscious was projecting and making him see things, which was concerning, but was at least plausible.

But then the figure started to walk towards him, and his breath caught. He really was here. Kuzy’s heart started to pound, and his brain scrambled. It had been so long since he had seen him in person, it felt like a dream. He wanted to run and embrace him, but it became evident that he had forgotten how to walk. Instead, he let him approach until he was mere inches away. His whole body came alive in his presence, though still in disbelief that he was here. He soaked him in like he was a drug. Still the same as always. Marcus.

“Jojo?” Kuzy breathed. “What are you doing here?”

Marcus smiled, that shy little smile Kuzy had seen millions of times. “You’ve been talking about this so much, I just had to check it out for myself.” He took a step closer, and Kuzy could smell that same cologne he used to drift off to sleep to. “I didn’t want to leave you alone on Christmas.”

“But how? How you here?”

“Well...let’s just say they don’t know I’m here,” he said with a twinkle in his eye.

“You snuck out?”

“I may have left the team hotel and gotten onto a plane without telling anyone.”

A smile tugged at Kuzy’s lips. “You a rebel? For me?”

The soft look of love coming from Marcus’s eyes felt almost tangible. “You’re the only person that would make me even think of breaking the rules.”

Kuzy could almost feel his heart grow two sizes in his chest. He made a note that he had to pull off something huge for Valentine’s Day. He pulled Marcus in by his tie and kissed him, softly, gently. Marcus caressed the side of his face, the touch of his fingertips almost like a kiss itself. Kuzy drew himself away from Marcus’s soft lips and rested their foreheads together, gazing deeply into Marcus’s long, beautiful eyelashes.

Marcus took Kuzy’s hands. “I don’t have much time,” he whispered, his voice full of regret. “I left just before we were supposed to have a quick team meeting. When they realize I’m not there, they’ll search the hotel, and then they’ll track me down because I’m pretty sure they can track my phone...by now, I think I only have twenty or so minutes before they realize I’m not in the city.”

Kuzy deflated. “Oh.” There went all his ideas of a night of passion.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Kuzy could see the tears beginning to pool at the bottom of Marcus’s eyes. “But I had to see you, even if it was only for thirty seconds. I couldn’t bear it.” He took a shaky deep breath and stood up straight. “We only have a moment, so I have to ask...may I have this dance?”

Kuzy’s heart clenched. “Of course.”

The music changed to a slow, heartsick ballad at the perfect moment. Of course it did. The universe perpetually kept them apart, but once in a blue moon everything aligned perfectly for just a short moment. Marcus wrapped his arms around Kuzy’s waist, and Kuzy held tight to Marcus’s shoulders, sinking his face into the crook of Marcus’s neck. And the two of them began to dance.

Kuzy just wanted to stay wrapped up in him forever. He remembered back before Marcus was ripped away, when he didn’t have to wait months and months to see him. When they practiced together, shared meals together, spent their nights together. He couldn’t remember the last time they had shared a bed, something that used to be a regular occurence. Everything used to be carefree, and they indulged in  all their time together without a worry in the world. And now, whenever they saw each other, in the back of their minds was always the ticking clock of when they would have to leave each other again.

Now that Marcus was here, he didn’t want to let him go. Tom and Andre always went on about their plans to kidnap Marcus and keep him here forever; maybe he should give them a listen. It wasn’t fair that they had to be apart for a majority of the year. Marcus was his best friend, and they were just so deeply in love. There was no one in the world quite like him, and Kuzy knew there was no one else who understood him on the level Marcus did, and no one who understood Marcus like he did. Marcus made his heart flutter, his body dance, and his lips smile. When they were together, it felt like time stopped. And he sure wished it would right about now.

Suddenly, Kuzy heard a ding. Marcus stopped their swaying and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He gave it a glance and quietly cursed. He looked Kuzy in the eye, the pain and longing already clear on his face.

“I have to go.”

Marcus brought a hand to his face and pulled him in for a kiss, his lashes wet.

“Until next time.”

But Kuzy had no idea when next time would be, and the hopeless thought almost made him burst into tears. He tried to put on a brave face, though he was sure the tears were in his eyes as he replied, “Next time.”

And then he was gone, slipping away through the back door, and Kuzy was once again alone. The sudden feeling of loneliness pressed upon his chest and made it feel difficult to breathe. It wasn’t fair. None of this was fair. All he wanted was to wake up every morning and be with him. See his face, hear his laugh, hold his hand. Even those little things were snatched away from him.

Sniffling, Kuzy wiped at tears on his cheeks, but it only did so much good. Fuck, he really hoped no one saw him, as he’d have to explain himself and then he’d  _ really _ start crying.

He didn’t get his wish. At that point, T.J., on his way to the snacks, spotted him and made a beeline.

“Hey, Kuzy!” T.J.’s cheery and booze-laden voice was accompanied by a nice, bright smile. “I haven’t seen you out on the dance floor. Come out and join us!” Then he paused and got a good look at him. His voice lowered. “Hey, are you okay?”

Kuzy sniffled and nodded. “Yeah, I just...stabbed myself with one of the serving forks, you know how it is.”

T.J. nodded sincerely. “Yeah, I get that. I do stuff like that, I’m such a klutz.” He chuckled. “You know, I thought I heard you talking to someone over here.”

Kuzy’s heart pounded. T.J. couldn’t have seen him. No one saw him, probably; Marcus was very sneaky. Kuzy could have told T.J. the truth, take comfort in a friend, and bawl his eyes out right here. But he didn’t want to open that wound any more than it already was. He didn’t want to let anyone in. Not right now. This felt like a secret he wanted to keep between him and Marcus. Something to hold onto until he saw him again, even if that wouldn’t be for another six months.

“No one here. You’re drunk, Oshbabe. You’re probably hearing things.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right. Eggnog drunk is a  _ whole _ different type of drunk.” He jostled Kuzy in the shoulder. “So, are you coming on over to the dance floor?”

He didn’t want to disappoint those eager eyes, but the fact that he was going to just depressed him even more. “No, I don’t think I’m feeling up to it tonight. I’ll stay back here.”

“Whatever floats your boat, man.” T.J. gave him one last glance-over. “You still look like you could use a hug.”

T.J. embraced Kuzy and squeezed him tight. Kuzy, surprised at the gesture, wrapped his arms around T.J.’s back and leaned into him. The sudden feeling of comfort and human companionship almost made him start crying again, but he steeled himself and used his willpower to keep that from happening. He couldn’t make himself into a burden. Not here, not now. Instead he just held on tight until T.J. let him go.

“Always here for you, man.” He patted Kuzy’s chest. “Merry Christmas, Kuz.”

He watched T.J. rejoin the team on the dance floor, starting to yell and sing along badly to the music. Maybe one day he’d confide in T.J., but not tonight. He looked at everyone with joy in their eyes having a fantastic time. Even if he couldn’t enjoy the night and spend it with the person he loved most in the world, that didn’t mean nobody else could. He wasn’t a big enough asshole to ruin it for everyone else. So while the guys danced and celebrated winter, he ached for summer.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr at @daddyoshie


End file.
